Ya know, the sooner we learn about grace....God's grace, I think it would be better for us all. I mean GRACE. Not the, "thank you God for our good food" kinda grace. But Grace. Getting something we don't really deserve at all based on our attitude or actions. If I don't get it...then how are my sweet children gonna get it.

Recently, I was so frustrated with my ______________ attitudes. Fill in the blank with a person or persons of your choice. For me, it was my lovely children. Sound familiar? I was downright mad at their little ungrateful hearts. AND I was also sick and tired of apologies. I wanted RESULTS darnit! I am tired of the eyes rolling. I am tired of the complaining about having to do _______________ or the "I wish I had this new ___________" You get the idea. In my family, the ungrateful heart breeds a terrible attitude.

So, I am sick and tired of this display, and as I am driving down the road, I am just steaming about it. I want results. I am sick and tired of hearing the, "Sawwwwwrrreeeeeee" whine. I am thinking about how the NEXT conversation is about to go down. I am rehearsing how it will play out in my head. I am thinking, "The next time I hear one of you say 'I'm sorry', I'm gonna say back to them, All you ever say is sorry! But you never change, You keep doing the same things.....if you were truly sorry, you would change! You just keep doing the same old things!"

HMFFFFF! I'm driving, I'm fuming......I'm thinking this through some more, and almost immediately I am reminded of my sins and I MEAN IMMEDIATELY, I hear my heavenly father, my Papa, say this back to me. Like, a gentle loving dad. Not the way I sounded in my head ranting at my own children who I dearly love, by the way. He says it softly. Not condemning, but more like me at his lap, saying like my children say to me....."I'm sorry Papa, Daddy, I won't do it again. I am sorry for my unforgiving spirit.....my ungrateful heart, my judgemental heart, my mean words about people in my life who have hurt me. I am sorry God for not doing what I said I was gonna do for you. I am sorry I lost my temper with my kids. I was so busy yesterday, and I am sorry I didn't even talk to you or get in your word. I am sorry I don't see myself the way you see me....that I put myself down. How that must hurt you to hear how harshly I judge myself. Will you forgive me?" "I will try to do better, I promise......."

Can't we hear our children taken back to this with us? How much we love our children. How soft our hearts are for them. This is how our God feels about us.......to the power of about a .......million or so. I know we can get frustrated. I know our children test our patience. So do we test patience and frustrate.

So, I tell God I am sorry, and I am truly grieved at my heart's condition. (kinda like my sweet ones are sorry) "Lord, please forgive me," I beg. "Lord, will you help me in these areas? I want to be better." He says back to me, "Yes my child, I love you, I forgive you." 1 John 1:9 tells me that "If I confess my sin he is faithful and just to forgive it and then (here is the kicker) he cleanse me from all my unrighteousness" My sin is as far as the east is from the west now. I am clean and made righteous again. And his help is there. His help is in his word. His word, the Bible is life. It is full of instructions, right there for me to take in......

So what this teaches me is that while I don't really deserve God's grace here because my heart can be black, He still forgives. I am humbled. I want to show my children a picture of God in me. I want them to see love, patience, and forgiveness. The best picture of God that my children can ever receive is through my relationship with God. My love, patience, forgiveness, gentle instruction, gentle answers, gentle and loving discipline is teaching them more about God than any Bible devotion or lesson we have at the breakfast table.

The minute I understand His Grace and Mercy to me....The minute I choose to receive that Grace, is the minute I can extend it to my own children. I pray you will truly know God's love and grace, and his peace today.

Blessings,

Shelli