If Only.......

I think that God uses my relationship with my children to teach me a lot of lessons about His love for me. I know it sounds weird, but true......at least for me.

The other day, I was again, frustrated with Lily's attitude. It was getting ready to be her birthday. Her party was a week away. She had NO idea that I had planned for her a big surprise sleep over at a hotel with some of her friends from school. She actually thought she wasn't getting a party at all, because of a previous punishment. For some reason, she was really being a "stink-pot" that particular morning one week before this awesome surprise I had worked up for her. Again, here comes an ungrateful heart, thus a stinkin thinkin attitude with it. AND she's not even in PUBERTY YET. Lord help this mama!

So, I'm in the kitchen makin her lunch and slammin down the bread, and slappin on the peanut butter, and throwing in the juice box and all the time just a rantin (in my head) on and on about "if only you knew the surprise I had in store for you....you wouldn't have such a bad attitude . and if only you knew the things I had planned........"

I stopped right there dead in my lunchbox tantrum of my own in my own stinkin thinkin.....

"Really!? God, Really?! can't I just express myself here first before you jump on in with my thinkin?" UGHHHH....I immediately hear his voice, gently again, remind me of this awesome love he has for me. He appeals to my heart by repeating back the words I was just thinkin about my own child. He says, "Shelli, if only you knew the blessings ahead....my glorious plans for you, my dear child, you wouldn't_______(fill in my yucky things here)________ Plus my ungrateful heart...blah blah blah......

If only......I wouldn't waste so much time on _______________. I would be thankful. I would be content. I would spend more time with you Lord.....

If Only....................

How would we all be different, IF ONLY...........

God is so full of grace and mercy. There is NO other God like this. There is NO OTHER GOD period. When will we embrace this. When will we truly understand it?

God has a glorious plan for our lives. We get sidetracked in our muck, and in our stinkin thinkin. We get off on tangents. Not Him. I want to receive my full purposes, I want to receive all that he has for me. I choose the straight path.....I choose to get off the tracks and back on the road. How about you?

What is your If only????????